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A Year of Stepping Back?

Treasure Island San Francisco

Happy New Year! Hope your 2019 is off to an incredible start!

As for me, I am going to try something different this year.

Over the last few years, I’ve had too much on my plate I’ve added too many things to my plate; biting off more than I could chew on several levels. I’d been working too hard and playing too hard and it feels weird that I still believe that’s the way to go. I actually prefer burning the candle at both ends.

But towards the end of last year, I had realized that I set the bar so high on a lot of things that I did not feel accomplished at anything.

“You are not superhuman. You want to make the world run smoother, accomplish great heights, have substantial relationships, and see growth in your personal life. Remember that you don’t get more than 24 hours in a day, and you can’t do everything. You have to be selective about who/what you invest in and make sure you’re putting the necessary time.”

I’ve read this recently and instantly connected.

Remember that you don’t get more than 24 hours in a day. What a revelation, huh? Well, some people (moi) do need that reminder once in a while. And for me, planning the 24 hours to the T meant that relaxing in front of TV for an hour was a crime, weekends meant spending more hours working on my passions and stressing out the mind and body. It was a good day only if I ate healthy, exercised and spent some time towards personal growth. Sharing my commute with loved ones meant losing a few hours of audiobook/podcast time, vacation meant exploring to the point of exhaustion, meeting people meant losing time that I could’ve otherwise spent on my craft (Yes, I’m afraid I did feel this way 🙁 ). In short, I was too focused that I did not take time to enjoy life and being present.

My excuse was that “I can’t help it if I want to plan every hour of the day, I am a hustler, that’s who I am”. I convinced myself that I was wired that way. I made things incredibly hard on myself by not only setting the bar so high but also being my worst critic.  Of course, working and planning was enjoyment but I missed those moments of doing and thinking nothing.

It is time for me to rethink if all the projects and passions are worthy of my time. I might still plan every hour and set unreasonable goals. But I am not going to beat myself up for not achieving them.

This year, I would like to set a few intentions; Intentions to stop and smell that flower, greet the random stranger, spend time with loved ones, breathe consciously, create mindfully, take it slow and allocate time to do NOTHING. Yes, nothing! 

May be this will be the year that I step back and slow things down. But will (can) I do it? That we shall see…

I would love to know your thoughts on this and any intentions/resolutions you’ve set for the year. Feel free to comment below!

woman in sunflower field

Hi there!

I am Aswani Kurra. I am an engineer, dreamer and part-time wanderlust, writer and wine lover. I always had an urge to write, create and travel. So I created this space to satisfy my creative itch and combine all my skills to help you plan your Charming Escape.

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  1. Deepthi Chelupati on January 29, 2019 at 11:45 am

    Aswani… Love your blog! I had a similar revelation last year and I tried/still trying few things.. a) pick only 1-2 things I love and go deep into it b) zoning out, meaning only think about the thing I am currently doing, even I’d it’s nothing.. 🙂
    Good luck for the new year and i will pick up some writing this year as I explore and go deep into Photography!

    • Aswani on February 18, 2019 at 11:24 am

      Hi Deepthi, Thank you so much for stopping by and sharing your thoughts! I will try to do the same and see how it goes! With the constant barrage of ideas, it is hard to pick 1-2 but we can try for sure!
      And taking time to do nothing is definitely on my list. Good luck to you too! 🙂

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